Where in the world?
I'm just a small small guy in a big big world. There are 2 places I call home in this world. Brunei, where I was borned and lived till my teenage years. Canada, where I grew up and influenced me to be the person I am now. But I feel that I belong somewhere else. Or I feel like I'm one to travel and see the world, and work around the world.
I still have no clue where I want to end up. Where I want to see myself living. Where I want to settle down and start a family. All these thoughts have been swimming in my mind lately. Am I ready for another move? I know I'm not financially ready, nor will I be financially ready for a while. But I feel like Edmonton has not much to offer me anymore. That, or my heart has really gone somewhere else.
I can resolve all problems. And move back to Brunei, and see what there is to be offered there. That is my first home to begin with, so I should be able to survive there right? Or am I so far westernized that I will not be able to re-adapt.
A new goal in life. I want to travel and see the world. But to do that, I sill have to have a homebase. Where do I want settle down at? Those are indeed questions I find myself trying to answer.
Are things arranged ahead of time?
Shakespeare said "to be or not to be, that is the question." Sometimes, we don't have control over that, and it becomes, it's just not meant to be.
The good thing with being human is that, we have the ability to cope with things. Some are easier than others, but in the end, we would eventually figure out what to do. The survival of the fittest. The strong can cope with things better than the weak. If the strong would look after the weak, then wouldn't that theory be disproved? It doesn't have to be a dog eat dog world out there. If we can take care of each other, wouldn't we all be able to cope together?
Support from friends is a luxury not everyone can afford to have. I count myself lucky, to have a great stable of them when I need the support. Some would think it to be weak to need support, to seek for help. To those people, I say, we are only human. We have ranges of emotions, and we like to share. Happiness, sadness, anger, etc, can be projected from you with ease. Believe it or not, how we are feeling can definitely influence how our close ones feel. So, do not lose that support, nor take those support granted.
So, back to my original train of thought. When things are not meant to be, do you just take it? Or do you find ways to overcome it? Those are the questions that's been swimming around my head the last little while. Hmmmm indeed.
A saying
A saying we used to have while working in Fort Mc is, "a bad day at home beats a good day at work anytime."
A guest heard me say that to a different guest, and he went and said to me. "Michael, you should meet my first wife, it would be the other way around"
Bahahahahaha
Angry Food Court boss
So, friend of mine got some Chinese food at a food court, couldn't finish it. So I went back and asked for a box.
Me: We got some food here earlier and couldn't finish it, can i get a box?
Old Chinese man(in thick Chinese accent): Y U want box? Y U no finish?
Me(shocked and dumbfounded): cause we're full?
Old Chinese man: ai ya ya
I walked back to my friends, not even mad, but instead, laughing at the fact I got yelled at for wanting a box...
Life goes on and on and on
What is "to be happy"? Having a comfortable career? Or having enough money in the bank account? I guess the definition is different for everyone. That definition seems like its always changing for me. Am I happy? Yes, but what is it that makes me happy? That might be a combination on a lot of things. And I have yet to figure that out. But does one really need a reason to be happy? I don't believe so. Being a happy person is more fun than being a sad person!
I find I lack discipline. Discipline in life. It is a maturing process that I find I have not possess yet. Do I have a lot to learn? Yes. Do I have things an habits I need to change? Most definitely. I do believe I'm still in search for that one motivation to achieve it.
I guess lately I've been doing some self reflection, to see where I am in life, and where I want to be in life. What am I doing with my life. Who's been in my life. Am I being negligent and taking everyone for granted? A good friend of mine recently told me something that made me realized that. "I think you are a great friend, but you make me feel like I'm not a good enough friend to you". That statement had a big impact on me. I realized that friends should never be taken granted for. We have to show our friends that we do care about them, and that we should be able to miss each other's company. And to be able to share feelings. So I want to make a commitment, to make sure everyone knows what a good friend they are. Friends are something none of us can live without. To the person who made me realized that. Thank you. I will miss you.
